I’m currently on my third lot of night feeds and it really does blow my mind thinking about how many I must have done over the last seven years.
In fact it’s probably not a healthy thing to do, working out how much sleep I haven’t had.
You wouldn’t think maths has anything to do with babies but I think it does. Your life is consumed with the number of feeds, the number of nappies and the hours between feeds.
I remember the shock I felt with Boo about the never ending cycle of feeding and that by the time you had changed and winded, it was almost time for the next feed.
Second time around I just accepted it. Mainly because after your first, you realise that night feeds in general and sleeplessness in particular do not last forever.
Saying that though, I still went back to maths. I remember counting back pats when winding and, even now, when I put G to bed, I still rub his back and count to 20. I’m not sure if that’s weird.
Over the last few months though, I have discovered something. Something which would have changed the way I think when I had my first.
Counting sleep with babies is the theft of joy and sanity.
I used to work out how many hours sleep I had. Some days, when I spoke to my mum on the phone, she would ask me.
Lately though I have stopped looking at the clock when baby j wakes.
I don’t need to know. It doesn’t matter that I’ve only had 3 hours sleep. I don’t need to sit there in the morning lamenting it (although I do still look lovingly at my bed).
Baby J is the worst sleeper of the three. I am 100 per cent that the other two were sleeping through at this age. He has two 20 minute naps in the day and, if he has any longer, he is up half the night.
Even wit the correct naps, he is still up anything from once to every hour and sometimes for a whole two hours before sleep catches up with him again.
I am constantly tired. Not least because sometimes, when I have got him back to sleep at 4am, his big sister is up at 5.
I am beginning to think he might just not be a good sleeper and, some other mums I’ve spoken to have said their children did not sleep properly until they were at least four.
I must have been very lucky with the other two and their sleeping habits.
Don’t watch the clock. It will honestly make you feel marginally better.