It’s Valentine’s Day.
Did you wake up to breakfast in bed? A dozen red roses? Or maybe a diamond….
I woke up to the usual routine I’m afraid.
I told hubster that it was Valentine’s day earlier in the week. There would be no point being upset today if he had forgotten. I am afraid my farmer needs to be reminded-birthdays, Christmas, anniversary. I accept this. It is the way he is.
So over the dinner table last night, hubster made reference to a little bunch of daffodils I’d bought myself. ‘They didn’t last long did they,’ he said. I knew then that if I got a card today I’d be lucky.
In fairness to him, I did get a lovely card which said ‘On Valentine’s Day to My Wife’ which is an improvement on Christmas when the card said ‘To the Woman in my Life’ which I thought made me sound like we were having an affair.
All this love flying around had got me thinking though, is a romantic gesture once a year what us women live for or is marriage and relationships more than this?
I’m not talking flowers and gifts as a regular occurrence-if that happened I’d think there was something wrong.
I think it is the little things that make the difference in a relationship.
Like when he goes and puts diesel in my car on a Sunday night so I have enough to get to work (I usually run in fumes for days).
Or when he carries my washing upstairs for me-even that gives me a fuzzy little feeling.
I think as a society we have been spoiled my Disney films, romantic comedies and happy endings. Happy endings don’t necessarily have to involve a handsome prince and a diamond that means you can’t move your left hand.
No, happy endings involve hard work. Giving and taking and giving some more.
Having children propels couples into having to see each other in positions and instances that, pre-child, you wouldn’t have allowed them to see you in and I don’t just mean the giving birth.
Children don’t cement a relationship and people who have them to try and bring themselves closer together are in for a real shock. It brings you closer together genetically but you try being romantic when you haven’t slept for six weeks or you constantly have a toddler between you in bed.
I enjoy moaning about hubster but it is easy to get stuck in a rut by focussing on his bad points all the time (no house work, no child help-I could go on..). The fact is though I married him because I love him. We have a connection. He is my best friend and, I hate to admit it but I am not perfect. As much as I have to put up with his quirks, he has to put up with mine.
I may moan but he’s not a bad old stick really.
Happy Valentine’s Day.