I would just like to remind you that asking a woman when her baby is due, if she’s expecting, if she’s having another, would she like a seat, she’s got her hands full or any other phrase about pregnancy WITHOUT BEING 100% sure she is pregnant is unacceptable.
Just this week, a man was visiting Hubster for some business thing. I had to go in to get his car keys as the baby seat was in his car, G was asleep and I had to pick Boo up from school.
Later, Hubster told me, laughing, that the man had asked if we were having another baby.
Hubster obviously didn’t think this one through. As he laughed, I burst into tears.
Well who wouldn’t? Having been taking part in both dry-January and a gruelling-hardly-eaten-anything for eight days, what would usually have me outraged or laughing myself, had me in tears.
I would never, ever dream about asking someone the questions above but, it seems I am not the only one to suffer at the hands of an off the cuff remark.
When I lost one of the babies, my stomach was really swollen and someone asked me when it was due. When I told her it had died, she quickly shut up. At least I’ve probably stopped her asking anyone else.
This is the thing. Fertility treatment can make you bloat. Miscarriage can make your tummy pop out a bit. Who knows what people are quietly going through when someone mindlessly asks.
Here are a few ways, if you really, really have to know, to ask a woman without offending her:
How man children have you got?
Have you got children? Both of these questions would probably prompt her to tell you if she is indeed growing another.
If in doubt, don’t even think about asking. If anything else, it is actually nobody else’s business.
Oh and in answer to the title of this post, never.