Would allowing your son to wear a tutu make him less aggressive?

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I just read an article in the Daily Mail and I felt compelled to write.

It was about a couple who are bringing their little boy up to be gender neutral.

Apparently, this couple are allowing their son to wear both ‘boys’ and ‘girls’ clothing as they think gender stereotyping can be damaging to children and can make boys grow up to be aggressive.

Now it is up to them what they do with their children…can you sense a but coming?

BUT… if you were to bring your children up to be gender neutral, would you not dress them in anything but traditionally male or female? There would be no pink or blue.

I know this debate has been raging for a while but I thought the argument was the colour of items (pink toys for example) not the type-skirts, trousers etc?

Surely if these people claim the type of clothes you wear, shapes the type of person you become then the out-dated (and wrong) view that women who wear short skirts and low-cut tops are asking for rape would come under this warped umbrella?

If a boy wears trousers every day of his life, this is surely not a valid reason as to why he raped 17 girls when he was 33? If this is the case then maybe it could become a valid defence in court.

‘Sorry I beat up that old lady but I felt mentally scarred from wearing jeans for the past 20 years.’

It is not the clothes you wear that shape you as a person, it is the way you are brought up, the morals that are instilled in you by your parents and how you are shown right from wrong.

My daughter does ballet but rides around on her father’s tractor. I think if I imposed a blanket ban on her wearing pink it wouldn’t make any difference.

Parenting is all about balance and choice. If my daughter refuses to wear pink- fine or chooses to wear trousers-fine. If she plays with her train set instead of her Disney Princess dolls, it doesn’t bother me.

It is not the Thomas the Tank engine pyjamas or the Peppa Pig nightdress that leads children to grow up aggressive. It is usually something that has happened to them in childhood like witnessing a parent being aggressive or having your photo taken in a pink tutu and appearing in a national newspaper.

Am I missing the gender neutral point? What do you think?

 

This is a link to the article http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2559748/If-Max-wants-wear-pink-tutu-fairy-wings-Parents-raise-son-boy-AND-girl-wont-grow-aggressive.html

6 Comments

  1. Very interesting post, I was thinking a lot about gender stereotypes and kids a few weeks ago and its really difficult. Monkey can play with whatever toys he likes and if he wants to wear pink that’s fine with me. Its also fine if he doesn’t want to wear pink too. Balance has got to be the ideal and I’m with your thinking that clothes aren’t going to make you be more aggressive, that’s got to be more about your upbringing and experiences, and potentially a little bit on your nature. Very thought provoking post 🙂 xx

  2. I read this this morning too and I was confused that it got my back up and I couldn’t pin point why but reading your post here has sort of made my thoughts a little clearer.

    I think the part for me where I was mightily confused was why – if what they are doing is so so right – are they choosing to homeschool him? I saw that as almost shielding him from the bullying that they almost expect him to receive so already doubting what they are doing – I might be wrong.

    My daughters play with dolls, but also play with cars, then wear dresses, but also wear jeans & hoodies, the eldest does ballet, but plays and watches football……….

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