A confession-my secret addiction
To mark the start of a new series of my favourite programme, One Born Every Minute, I thought I’d let you into a little secret.
I have an embarrassing addiction.
You know how people giving up smoking calculate how much they would save in a year? Well I’ve done it for my obsession. If I stopped buying them, I’d save £203.96 a year. Isn’t that ridicuous?
Do you want to know what it is?
I am ashamed. My name is Emma and I’m a pregnancy-test-a-holic.
![1000x1000[1]](http://farmerswifeandmummy.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/1000x10001.jpg)
Now, it is no secret that I would love to have loads of children. After my six-week check with Boo, I would have gladly had another, there and then. We were getting married though so it had to be held off for a bit and, due to a couple of incidents and a bit of a medical condition on my part, we haven’t yet had another.
We’re not really trying but I still buy the tests.
I have started buying them in shops further and further away from home as I was starting to get paranoid that the lady in the chemist and the checkout staff at my local Sainsburys were beginning to get suspicious.
I think I am so obsessed with babies and my desire to have another that every month, I think my body my mind plays tricks with me.
It starts off maybe a week before my period is due and I convince myself that I might be pregnant so buy a pack of cheap, tests. I do one, it is negative but I kid myself that is too early and that I might still be pregnant.
So then, maybe a day before my period (when my mind is at its most active and all period symptoms are translated into early pregnancy symptoms) I spend around £12 on a Clear Blue test-they’re more sensitive/reliable but this one is negative too.
I then resign myself that I am not pregnant and think I will keep the second cheap test in the box for a time where I could be at least, a week late next month.
However, the morning that my period is due, I do the other cheap test-just to make triply sure. It is obviously negative.
And then I come on.
This has been going on for nearly three years, give or take a month or two. Three years is a jaw-dropping £600. On a stick that you wee on and gives you a negative result.
I honestly don’t know if there is a cure for my addiction.
I fear my love of programmes like One Born Every Minute is just fuelling my addiction but I can’t stop.
If we don’t have another baby, I am very, very happy with Boo but I would love a little brother or sister for her and us all.
I pray and keep my fingers crossed that one day my dream will come true.
Until then, I’m just nipping to the shop to get another test….
Aww bless you! Well the first step is admitting you have a problem 😉 seriously though I am 100% sure you are not alone in this addiction and its understandable, we’re only just starting to sort of try for another baby and we already see pregnancy symptoms everywhere, when it is just pmt! Last month I wasted a few expensive tests, this month the tests are burning a hole in my drawer but I am trying desperately not to do a test till I am actually late! (which I probably wont be) Not sure I’ll make it though! Thanks fir sharing! Xx #allaboutyou
Thank you. On my FB page, my cousin admitted she does it too. In a strange way, writing about it may have cured me. We will see…
I’ve been there, but without the big spend, I just waited each month until nature confirmed… finally past that stage now and happy with what – or rather, who we have – but I understand those feelings oh so well. Good luck for whatever – or whoever – the future brings. Thanks so much for linking up to #AllAboutYou
Wow that is a serious amount of money but can totally understand how addictive it can get. I hope that you won’t have to buy too many more and you get two blue lines soon x #allaboutyou
I did that when we were trying for our first, I think I ended up doing 4 or 5 tests just to confirm the positive. I hope you get that positive you’re hoping for soon. xx #AllAboutYou
Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing this post! I don’t have a pregnancy test vice but I have plenty of others and trust me, we all do! The only difference is that we’re not all brave enough to admit to them! Loving that you’re keeping things real. Keep sharing #AllAboutYou!
Thank you so much for joining in for this week’s Share With Me. I enjoyed reading your post and getting to know more about you and your lovely blog. Well, first things first you are admitting to it so that’s a start. Although I think I would be the same, I am eager like this too. But two of my friends do the same thing, they both have been trying for a few years and I think they pee on those sticks every week just to check! So you are definitely not alone my lovely. Look forward to reading more of your posts. 😉
I did this a lot when we were trying and spent a small fortune too, always convincing myself that this test would be the positive one. Even now when I don’t want anymore babies I still see symptoms in everything!
#AllAboutYou
I love this post haha!! It’s great that you are admitting your addiction!! £600 is a scary amount though!! It’s nice how excited the idea of being pregnant makes you though and fingers crossed for a positive test soon 🙂 xxx
I remember doing this when we were trying for our second, it took almost a year, so that was a lot of tests! Good luck though, I hope you get that positive result you’re hoping for x Popping over from Share with Me x
Hehe, love this! I don’t do it every month but when we were trying for our son, I was ridiculously obsessed and did become a bit of a pee on a stick addict!
That period of time (excuse the use of words!) is so difficult when you are trying and hoping for a baby. I remember hating the fact that i knew at any given point in the month during the year that we were trying for n2 where i was in my cycle, and doing tests a couple of times in hope. Those tests are excruciating, with hope and despair lying in those seconds while you wait. So brave of you to be so open and share this. While you wait for the positive result, try buying just the strips online in bulk, much cheaper, or else just do something to distract you and take you away from anywhere you can have a pee! Thanks for sharing on #AllAboutYou
thats an addiction i never heard of before) as long as it makes you happy, we are a savvy family so even to find out if im pregnant i was using the cheapest test and never thought of clear blue or other ones #binkylinky
I think Clear Blue are the best. I took 4 cheap ones when I was pregnant with Boo and they were all inconclusive so at that moment in time, it would have been more economical to just buy they Clear Blue-so that is my excuse now!! #binkylinky
Awww, well done in having the courage to write about this as I am sure that there is a lot of people that will be able to relate to this.
I buy a lot of them before as well. My OBGyne told me that I will have a hard time concieving so I have a stash of PT at home just so I know when I proved her wrong =P
#binkylinky
oh im sure you will. i have pcos so never thought id have any but now I’ve got 1 i am greedy for more 😉
I think everyone becomes a little bit obsessed with this when they are trying for a baby – I used to keep a stash of tests handy, but thankfully those days are behind me now! Good post! #BinkyLinky
I can understand this. My body played on tricks on me too. Convincing myself I was pregnant when I wasn’t. Thanks for linking up #binkylinky
Been there and done it too!! Never told the world though so you’re very brave! Awww Wishing you every ounce of luck for the positive result! I would LOVE another baby!! I have an 11yr old and an 8yr old …. hubby says no! lol! xxx #BinkyLinky
Wow, now thats an addiction! Although I had a similar experience when we were trying for my son, 18months of buying test after test. Wishing you the positive result you would like soon. x
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