Gender Bending Goats and a Deception

When shopping for a male animal-like a ram or a bull, one of the first things you do is grab hold of their testicles to check they are both there, they are the correct size and that they feel right.

That grabbed your attention, didn’t it?

We have a testicle MOT picture on the wall in the office-such is our expertise in the male of the species.

So recently, I told you that Ronnie the Rocket, the stinky Billy goat had come to stay to (hopefully) impregnate our lovely little pygmy goats.

He has gone home now and I was totally eager to see if there were any signs of pregnancy. This is the equivalent of taking a pregnancy test before your period is due in human terms.

The farrier was coming to do the goat’s feet. They had been in the field for a few months over summer so their feet needed doing.

As the farrier planned to turn the goats over, I decided to check their nipples. It’s early days but I thought there may be a little sign.

Chocolate, the bigger one was first. She was flipped over and I struggled to find the nipples. Then I saw it.

A penis.

Chocolate was not a girl at all. He is a wether. He has been castrated hence us not seeing anything dancing down between his legs but the people we got them off definitely said they were two females.

I laughed. Then almost cried.

I felt such a fool. We have had these goats for two years and all was riding on them having babies next year.

Then I worried about the other goat but I had seen Ronnie the Rocket doing the business with her so I knew she really was female and, when her feet were done, I saw the nipples.

I cannot believe it.

Just when I thought I had earned my farmer’s wife stripes, this happens.

The most hilarious bit of it? Hubster came with me for the goats so he is as much to blame as me.

The thing is though, with female reproductive organs being on the inside, if you’re buying a farm animals, you tend to just trust who you are buying them off.

We won’t be doing that again.

I joked to my mum that goat burgers were on the cards and she was appalled. It was a joke. Chocolate is safe but I am left in a predicament because if Chip is pregnant and I have to separate her to have her baby, Chocolate is going to be on his own.

Plus the fact that we paid for the goats as a pair of females.

In hindsight, it does now make sense. The goats were allegedly twins but Chocolate is twice the size of Chip. When Ronnie the Billy goat came, he would let Chip eat but I had to feed Chocolate separately-that is why.

These things seem to happen to us all the time.

The age-old saying ‘don’t count your chickens before they hatch’ can be extended to goats, I have been excitedly been daydreaming that this time next year, there was the possibility of eight goats at the farm if Chocolate and Chip had of ad triplets each.

I think at the moment, I will be grateful for one goat baby.

Lesson most definitely learned.

Farmer’s Wife 0 Goats 1.