9 Comments

  1. Oh darling, this must be so tough. You’re doing an amazing job and don’t worry about the kids, they have such rich lives with you and the farm and the experiences they have, they won’t miss the holidays. I hate that you are lonely though and wish that I was closer so I could pop over for a cuppa some nights and keep you company. I reckon we should start saving and have a girls and kids only holiday next summer xxx

  2. Oh Emma, I wish I was closer. I’d be happy to sit and drink coffee with you, I know how difficult loneliness is. Always there if you want to chat though, drop me a message on social media anytime.
    Nat.x

  3. Hi there,

    Im that mother too. At times. It is a wonderful life but really difficult with young children. I bet you’re very close to your children. I know I am with mine but that doesn’t stop me from hiding in the hot press when they get too loud and the farmer has no intention of coming in. None. And thats the business but it is a tough business! Find little ways no matter how small to mind yourself! I blog at girlinwellies.com – my youngest is four now but I remember when it was really full on and it was difficult (not that I see it getting easier, sorry ;))))) Mind yourself and keep the chin up! Anne

    • farmerswifeandmummy

      Thank you so much. I’ve had a really bad day today and this has made me feel better. I am
      Going reading your blog now 🙂

  4. Bridget Green

    My children are now 30 and 25 but can really relate to how you feel. It does get easier but them they leave home! I have a job away from the farm for a few days a month which keeps me sane. Try to keep friends that can relate to farming and meet up. It is hard but you have to keep going till drilling over. My son was born in June and I remember taking him to his dad on the tractor in September and saying I have had enough you look after him! I look back now and wonder how I managed but you will.

  5. Anne

    I know this post is years old, but you have written my current feelings. I am so overwhelmed with loneliness. I’m so scared of growing old with a man who just isn’t available. I love him so much but I really wish I had thought long and hard about my choice in partner. I was so naive. 15 years together and 2 kids in and I can’t help feel like I may aswell be single. I look on enviously at your ‘typical’ family and would kill for 6pm finished, family teas together and weekends away. The only time off we get together as a family is when it’s raining (not ideal) and it’s always very last minute so very hard to make plans. I’ve attended so many events on my own, weddings, parties, dinners, days out – the list could go on. Non of my friends or family (I don’t come from a farming family) fully understand, they try, but they don’t. I work part time which helps but since lockdown that has been from home. I try my best to meet up with people as much as I can and it does help but the nights are the hardest. I’m worried that when the kids are grown and gone I’ll be sat alone, waiting for a man to finish work, wondering if my best years were wasted on someone who chose work over family. I know forming isn’t ‘just’ a job, but there is balance that should be made.

    I know I’m having a really bad day/month. I know that I love so many things about farming and I don’t want to seem Ungrateful, but I just didn’t anticipate that this crippling loneliness would be all consuming at times.

    Thank you for your post. Thanks for sharing and making me feel less alone.

    Here’s to another day 🙂

    • farmerswifeandmummy

      Oh you poor thing. I might have written it years ago but I am solo parenting again 😉 I am sure when the children get older it will be easier. I try and use it as a treat now. Tonight we had pizza for tea watching TV as a treat. We wouldn’t do that if the farmer was here. Chin up. We all have bad days xx

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